Cargo Shorts: Are they okay?

If you are materialistic and only care about how something looks, and not their actual functionality then no they are not okay.  I'm not sure what all the flack has been on them, do they really look that bad?  Do they define your personality and automatically make you immature if you wear them?  I don't think so, the people that are royally against them have never lived outside of a city, and never needed them as a functional piece of their wardrobe based on their every day life like some of us do.  Do you hate backpacks too?  I caught so much slack when I moved back to the city after being abroad because I wore my backpack everywhere, I was made fun of so much and even caught a nickname "backpacks."  Well I worked remotely and needed my laptop on me at all times since I was always on call, what was I supposed to do?  Eventually I switched to a more business laptop bag, but still what's the big difference?  Live abroad, move to a "developing" country and you will need cargo shorts and a backpack every day.  Lets go over why they are not only okay, but necessary when you are traveling.

1. THEY STORE YOUR STUFF

So when I was abroad, I always had to carry my passport (among other things).  It was also hot all the time, so shorts were all I could wear, and I'm not a big jorts guy.  So at any given moment I had my passport, wallet, phone, and usually my mariner credentials or TWIC card as well so I could work.  You can also fit a six pack of cans in those pockets pretty easily, athough they will make your thighs cold.  Tough to store six things in your pockets when wearing your jorts or khaki shorts huh?  I mean if you want to wear a fanny pack for your stuff, your are more than welcome too. People have been trying to come up with a stylish way for dudes to carry their stuff, and have failed miserably.

2. WHAT ARE THE ALTERNATIVES?

I dunno about you, but this guys seems to be fine in them and he was able to taste a tiny bit of success.  He looks a lot less stressed out now than the last time I saw him, wonder what has changed in his life?  It looks like the weight of the entire world was suddenly lifted off and he is finally free, strange.  Anyway, he looks comfy, what would you wear in their place?  Let's explore!

FANNY PACK

Is this appealing?  I mean I don't know what your type is, but I'm guessing most of you would not date this man.  This character even talked about how unappealing he was, that was his whole persona.  We don't have a lot of options that DON'T get us made fun of to store our things, but we can't put everything in a wallet.  Where are we supposed to store our denture cream, rogaine, and "touch of grey?"  Yes, we need extra pockets!  Now if you have and wear one proudly, and need it for some reason more power to you!  It's just a little bag, who really cares what other people think as long as it serves your purpose. Would I wear one?  No, probably not, it isn't functional for me until they make laptops the size of playing cards.  Again, I just needed a couple of extra pockets, and not something that can get caught on things and potentially cause harm.

SATCHEL

Well there is always a satchel! Yes, while this does serve the purpose of storing all of our things, we don't really want this, we just need some extra pockets.  When I was living abroad I either didn't want to wear or carry anything, or needed to have my laptop handy so this wouldn't qualify for me.  I don't judge anyone that has one of these, it's just not serviceable for me, but to each his/her own.  If you own and wear something that is functional, I will never pass judgement, and you shouldn't either.  You don't know what they may need it for, and I never understood why people made such a big deal over extra pockets on shorts, or a bag someone needed to get through their every day life.  Let people do what they need to do huh?  #Letpeoplenjoythings

PURSE

Now, unfortunately not all of us can be this guy and do whatever we damn well please. He has a day time show about cooking or something correct? If you want to go full in though, you can just get a purse and tell everyone to go kick rocks. If you aren't snoop status however, I'm guessing you will have issues with this in your circle and family.  Do I care what other people think?  No, not at all, but there is a fine line between worrying about what your friends and family will say, and just not wanting to deal with all the vitriol.  People will tear you apart over shoes you wear (or don't wear), a bag you carry, and how many pockets are on your shorts, and it's just not worth it to deal with society and their touchy judgments most of the time, so just skip it and wear what you want.

3. THEY ARE DARN COMFORTABLE

Go ahead, tell me this guy doesn't know anything about style, he is literally a poster boy. Now, he probably has another person carrying all of his things around for him, but not all of us have that luxury do we?  I bet he has a deflated soccer ball in one of those pockets, just in case.  So far there seem to be a lot of interesting people that are enjoying their nice cool pair of shorts!

4. THEY ARE COOL

Those ladies are so impressed with those shorts they can't stop staring at them, plus they are breezy and keep the temperature down.  I would suggest keeping the fly up however unlike this fellow, but he looks to be in a bit of a rush.  Not sure what this guy is so busy doing, maybe there is a boat going down or something, who knows?  The hat, I mean, do as you please, I just don't think I could pull that off, but this guy doesn't seem to care all that much.

5. THEY COME IN MANY COLORS

Even though it may be hard to see these, they still serve whatever purpose this guy is going for.  Maybe it's to hide from that cheetah that is grabbing on him, maybe it's just that he doesn't want to be recognized.  I think I've seen him before, is he Captain America?  Or wait no that's not right, is he a dancer?  Anyway, whatever he does he is free and clear in those invisible shorts, and looking good.

BOTTOM LINE

Wear whatever you want, who cares what other people are going to say.  Is it necessary for you to get through your day?  Than do it, they are probably just jealous that they can't pull off those wonderful, light, stylish, and functional garments as easily as you can.  If everyone is so focused on what you are wearing and you just can't stand them anymore tell them to go to the beach.  Once they are at the beach tell them to kneel down on the sand, and just pound all of it, just pound all of the sand.  I'm going shopping today, there is a sale on cargo shorts and I need another color before I move to Mexico.  Adios!